you never came ):

Thursday, July 28, 2005

10:45 PM
the risk i took to love you .

okay. where do i start? *thinks hard*

i realised something.
i havent genuinely smile in a long time.

i was flabbergasted by myself.
sam havent genuinely smile for a 'decade'?
that's not her right?

shelovetosmile asbight as a star.

'chronically ill' now.

anything occured to her?
trying to conceal anything, miss cheong?

Mmm. i think because of my N's plus i still gotta work.
exhausted? ya! that's the right word to justify.
maybe i should either scale down or curb myself from working.

*think hard again*
nothing to write about.
so how? hehhs.
BYEE.

Wednesday, July 27, 2005

3:53 PM
the risk i took to love you .

the exam shook my faith..
argh.
"you of little faith, why are you so afraid?" Then He got up and rebuked the winds and the waves, and it was completely calm." MATT 8:26

my prelim is coming.
that means, my N's is coming VERY soon.
ohmygod ohmygod.

"all things work for the good of those who put their trust in Him" Romans 8:28

Putting my trust in Jesus does not mean things will always work out the way i personally think they should for me. I guess it means that i trust in the Lord that He hath made all things work for my own good according to His will.

(:

Thursday, July 14, 2005

9:36 PM
the risk i took to love you .

hello hello hello

just suddenly got the mood to blog something here .
-sigh-
this is the feeling that im having !
i dont know why am i like that .
im tired .
REALLY TIRED .
just wanna ignore everybody in my life .
can i just be the kind of happy - go - lucky person
or
can i just dont be so emotional .
or
can i just heck everything ?

i dont understand myself .
something that i know i cant bear to leave yet i almost wanna give up
every single day , i kept thinking of this thing .
should i leave or stay ?
a lot of questions ! alot of questions !
nobody understand me .
NOBODY !
since im not happy .
why should i stay ?

no more happy wondering .
weeping away .

Tuesday, June 28, 2005

11:34 AM
the risk i took to love you .

heavenly father ,
i wanna thank you once again .
i know my life worth nothing w/o you
thanks for the fav verse .

joshua 1 : 9

have i not commanded you,
be strong and courageous
do not be terrified
do not be discouraged
for the Lord your God will be with you whether you go .

thanks ya , esther !
i love youuuuuu .

Monday, June 27, 2005

10:21 PM
the risk i took to love you .

im crying .
i dont feel good .
father , HELP ME !

Sunday, June 26, 2005

10:09 PM
the risk i took to love you .

crestfallen !

im sick and tired of this kinda thing !

=((

Friday, June 24, 2005

3:02 PM
the risk i took to love you .

i got nothing to do now . so i decided to type a entry here .

just look back at my previous post . i remember one of them is about BGR stuff .
i feel so bad about it . i always thought that i'll never get into this kinda 'bad' relationship frm the start when i choose to be with the one and only one above . it's a personal conviction who and what you wanna choose in the end . the risk i took to get into a relationship really makes my walk with God turn adverse . at that point of tyme , i thought it's okay . i'll still love God as much as i love him frm the start . but i was wrong . really wrong ! i dont even wanna go church , i thought that i dont need God at point of tyme . i tried to conceal everything . i know it's not right yet i do it . hahahs . i think i was visually and hearing impaired by that stoopid satan . *bashing meself*

that's what i wrote last tyme :

One question I just asked myself today as I was thinking about it is "why do people want to get attached ?" I tried answering but I can't give a reason. I mean, if I were to say..

"so that there is someone there, so that I feel more secure?"
Shldnt my sense of security come from me being self-confident and knowing that God is always with me?

"I just wanna see how it is like."
Oh gosh, that is really selfish! cant you just observe and learn from real life examples around you? must you go in and get hurt and hurt others?

"It seems like the right age to be attached."
Really? or is it a herd mentality at work?

I believe we are all made for relationships. We all want to be able to relate. Yet, it's not about getting into wrong relationships that do not please God. -end-

HAHAHS . *laughing at my own enry*
i can tell people all this , yet i did it myself . all this are just waive for convicting myself not to get in one .
i know it's sweet . having someone whom you can share your life, your thoughts, your joy and sadness with .
hais . at tyme i just worn out of myself . why am i always envy those loving couple ? why this . why that .
but i know God will never get worn out of me . A BIG THANK YOU TO HIM . i choose to resumes this walk with Him . what about people who are far away frm God becos of this tempo affectionate love ? are you guys scouring for an answer ? Jesus is the answer . what are you waiting for ? unreservedly give up on bgr . i know it's not easy . i had experenice that . i understand your feeling . if you dont stop now . the love for that guy/girl will escalate . i bet you wont even wanna give up at point of tyme . i know it's not very good to post it on my blog . it might spoil my own creditability .but just wanna share to people that bgr is not everything .
i dont wanna be a sprinter in my walk with God . i wanna be a long distance runner for Him .
my fingers is tired now . gotta angie and gang later . tata ~